Pata majibu ya maswali yote uliyonayo kuhusu maisha ya chuo na changamoto zake

Self Care

Self care tips for when you are grieving the death of a loved one

You never heal from the loss, you just learn to live with it.

~ a quote by me when I realized that maybe there’s no moving on from this, it will always be a part of my life, something that is in my life story.

I had a pretty rough 2020, and it wasn’t because of COVID-19, i had it because of the emotional issues I was dealing with, things about the world that I was learning and what I would call ‘Quarter life crisis’. So even though I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions, I made one for 2021, and that was to chase joy, to chase happiness and the feeling of being alive, coming from a darker 2020 I figured 2021 would be more lighter if i did the chasing joy part well.

I wanted to, I planned to, but there’s a famous saying that says, ‘we plan, God laughs’, he did and so 2021 turned out differently than I thought. In March, after trying so hard to pull myself from depression, I felt myself drowning in grief when we lost my favorite president. I know most countries in the world have terrible leaders and governments that it is strange to hear someone mourning the death of the president the way we did. It’s strange to still feel the loss as fresh as when we first heard of his passing, five months later.

Grief can be overcoming, it can make one sink. Death sucks the life out of the dying, and it can do the same to the living. Grieving can feel like a dark pit that one falls in and there’s no one that is falling with you. When people try their best to hide it, you may feel guilty for expressing it too much or wonder if something is wrong with you for still crying when you see your beloved’s photo.

If you are grieving the loss of your loved one, I want you to know that there’s nothing wrong with you or the way you are grieving, no matter how long it feels like you are grieving. No matter how much everyone appears to have moved on, especially when everyone appears to have moved on, because the truth is when it comes to the loss of a loved one, we never move on, we learn to live with the loss, it will always be a part of us, our life story, our lives but if you are grieving a recent loss of a loved one, here are are self care tips that can have helped me too :

– Talk about it, with friends or with people who feel the same like you. This makes you feel less alone and it is comforting.

– Go through the feelings effectively. The thing about grief is that first you numb it, then you feel it, and then you learn how to live with it. Cry when you feel like it, allow yourself to go through the grieving stages, allow yourself to feel the loss.

– Practice gratitude for their lives and the time you had together on earth. This has been a great thing to do in holding their memories alive, in feeling comforted and grateful to have lived with them, having them share a life with us.

– Be in the nature more, it’s understandable that you may have days where you don’t want to see the light, but I have found being in nature, being outside so helpful, and when you are grieving, just dressing up to go somewhere can be a huge thing for you to do, and it’s totally understandable that you feel that way, however nature and her wind has some calming effect on your skin that maybe helpful for a minute.

Find time toget backtowhoyou are and what made youhappy
Eat well
Sleep well
Also know that the dead would want you to be happy with life, enjoy the art of living at least fo them, music therapy, gratitude for the lives they have lived, reflection



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