Eunice Tossy

This post was first posted on AfroSwagga, in Swahili

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It is easy to admire other’s bodies, to look at them and wish you had a body like them, to look at yourself in the mirror and see everything wrong, everything that you wish you could change. To not be satisfied with the body that you are in, to hate certain features on your face or stomach.

There was a time in my life when i used to hate my body, used to want to hide it, hide the parts that i thought were imperfect, not meeting the standard.

There was a time when i used to envy those who can eat anything without gaining weight, those slay queens who fit the mold, who have ‘perfect bodies’.

That time i used to think people judged me because of my imperfect body, they see that first before seeing me, i used to edit my photis, hide parts of my bodies, sit in some uncomfortable styles just so that i can hide my body, dress in clothes that hide it as well as uncomfortable sometimes. Just because of shame.

After meeting a lot of people and having authentic conversations with them, i discovered that i am not alone, many people feel this way.

It might be because of social media use that is displaying a stardand way to be and if you are not that you are not considered beautiful, or it may just be a mindset, hatred of how your body is in some parts /how it looks like ( height maybe) or hating your skin colour as well.

For whatever reason you are feeling the way you feel about your body, i just want to say that i understand, and i understand how sensitive this topic is, the tips that i will share are the ones that have helped me to be comfortable with my body, to learn to love it the way it is, i hope they help you do the same:

Tip 1- Admire and value all that your body goes through

Our bodies are us.

They go through a lot for and with us. Without our bodies, we wouldn’t be.

Our bodies go through a lot for us, that’s why it is important to listen to our bodies, the signs and everything that our bodies shows us. Be kind to your body, because you are being kind to you, show love to your body, bevause in turn you are loving you.

My body knows what it is doing, I trust it, in every size and shape.

Tip 2: Know that, thats the only body that you will have in this lifetime

Sometimes we feel inadequate because of comparison, advertisement and social media.

One thing that we need to know is that advertisers, wants customers, and most of them dont care if that comes from making you feel bad, what matters to them is that you buy their product.

And on social media, people post their filtered selves, successful selves.

Remember that in this life, thats the only body that you will have, isnt it wiser to spend your life in love with it?

Tip 3: Loving the parts that you think are #goals

When you start loving and appreciating parts that you love, sooner or later you might find out that even the parts that you dont, arent that bad as you used to think.

I think that is the power of appreciation.. you will start to see that what you think is bad/ugly is actually what makes you different, and that there is only one you in the world, only you.

Tip 4 – Silence people’s noises / voices

People are always talking in the world.

They are always setting the standard of beauty and change it as well.

I have realized that people say things because of who they are or how they feel rather than how you are or caring how that will make you feel.

Silence the noises from those people cause probably they also hate their bodies.

If its a page on Instagram, unfollow, if its people, dont give them your time of the day and dont take it personally, they probably say mean things to themselves as well.

Tip 5- Own your body

Knowing that this is the body that you get to rock under the sun, own it.

Appreciate it as a gift that it is, because trust me someone else looks at you and they wish they had hands…. our bodies are gifts to us.

Love yourself, walk confidently, own it, put on cloth that make you feel good, not hiding it cause you hate it, your body, exactly they way it is makes you unique, makes you, you.

Own it, look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are different, unique, and beautiful/handsome.

When given a good comment take it, cherish it.

Eunice