It’s been one week since I moved out of my mom’s home, I remember last Saturday like it was yesterday. I have done many acts of courage before, at least I would love to believe, but as an only child who’s first time out of her mom’s house was when she went to the army for three months and college for four years, moving out was both scary and exciting, but scary for the most part. I remember pushing dates because I had excuses but the truth is I just was scared of the whole ordeal.
In my first week of living alone, I have learned a lot, and I have had many ‘firsts’ that have made me feel proud and happy of the decision I made to move out. Here are some of the lessons that I have learned;
1. Apparently things rot quicker than I thought they did : The other day I wanted to cook potato but decided not to, so I left them on the table only to find them rotten the next day, so was the coconut that I left on the same place… Who knew this? Well it’s going to take me time, patience, grace and a lot of forgiving myself to learn all of these hands-on life skills, who knows? I might write a book about all the hacks and tricks I learn.
2. When you face your fears, you realize there was actually nothing to fear : It’s not that your fear was stupid, unreal or irrational, it’s just that life is unpredictable and your fear might come true but when it does you won’t die, you will figure it out. It won’t be the end of the world, it maybe devastating but it will leave you wondering, ‘this is it? okay, life has to go on’. You will figure it out, whatever it is, so don’t let that be the reason you stay in your comfort zone.
3. People are the reason you might love a place, they are also the reason you might hate a place : The thing is, in life, you need to have a balance between trusting and distrusting people. Especially in a new place where you know no one, you need to have an open heart to let new people in, but also a healthy dose of doubt to not trust those your instinct tells you not to trust otherwise you will be taken advantage of or you might miss out on the best relationships and experiences with people.
4. Slow down : A lot about being alive is kind of overwhelming, a lot of the decisions we make are overwhelming. If we are not careful we might find ourselves spending our days on a move, from one activity to another not really taking in the living experience. Not really taking in the changes, the lessons, observing life. At that pace, everything is life-threatening, at that pace, it is easier to look down on the experience that was once heroic in your eyes, so I learned to slow down.
I learned that life is about today, I should not think about what will happen if I don’t have rent to pay in the future etc. It’s okay to think about all that only when I’m budgeting not when I’m enjoying life. If we are not careful we can destroy the present with the fears and voices in our heads. So I have learned to slow down, it all makes sense when you slow down, it is easier to find a solution when you slow down.
Well those are the things that I have learned in my first week of moving out, it has been fun, overwhelming, scary and expensive but mostly fun. What are the things that you learnt when you first moved out? And what advice do you have for us, newbies?